After my spirit guides had made it clear in so many different ways that it was important for me to go online and share, I made my first hesitant babysteps in the online world.
Commenting on a blog
In May, 2014, I discovered a blog about the highs and lows on the journey of awakening on the blogging platform blogspot. The woman who wrote it had also found great value in the technique of resting in awareness and shared how she dealt with the challenges in everyday life. My interest was hooked and I wanted to connect.
So, I summoned up all my courage and left a few comments, but always as an anonymous guest commenter (but signed by my first name) as I was still too afraid to create an account and have a user on blogger.com.
This was my first step to share my experiences not only with friends, but also online where it would be visible to anyone in the world (eek!).
On one hand, I was afraid. But after I had conquered my fear, it felt so good to connect with someone who was going through the same journey and had to deal with similar issues. That blog became one of my favorite places for a while.
Dream: losing myself in irrelevancies
On May 28, 2014, I dreamed that my Dad wanted to take me and the rest of our family on a hike. Not very long, but quite steep. And when we would return, it already could have become dark.
Because I was concerned about the darkness at the end of the hike, I went home and wanted to get my hiking boots and a flashlight to be better prepared.
But at home, I got engaged in a lot of minor, unrelevant unnoyances which caused some delay. And when I went back to the hiking group with my boots and my flashlight, I had to go a long way through sand wearing slippers. It was terribly arduous and slow and unfortunately, I did not make it to the group. Then I woke up.
Interpretation I thought it meant a reprimand again that I was about to lose myself in irrelevancies. While I thought that commenting on the blog was about being prepared, some guiding force in me thought it was just a distraction
Posting in a forum
Also in May 2014, I had discovered an online forum for people on the spiritual path. It was about awakening, enlightenment, awareness, non-duality, but it also contained discussions about near-death experiences (NDE) and out-of-body experiences (OBE).
I circled around it a few times with hesitation. And around end of May, 2014, I came out of hiding there, created an account with a nickname, and on June 3rd, 2014, I shared my weird experiences with anger and burned out light bulbs, inner peace and miracles, and with resistance and the resulting breathing issues.
Again, like for the blog where I commented anonymously, I had to go through fear, but afterwards it felt so good to be able to connect with folks who were on a similar journey.
Shouldn’t I feel blessed?
On June 4, 2014, I saw a video about an autistic girl named Carly. She shared that she had difficulty to talk and connect with others due to her autism, but she also shared how happy she was that at least her writing helped her to communicate with others.
I was very moved by her story. But I was also moved because it seemed to be like a message from beyond that I should consider myself blessed to be able to connect and communicate with others through writing and speaking easily. It was like another nudge to come out of hiding and share more.
This post is part of a series about my spiritual journey (table of contents).