A furry leaf decorated with tiny water droplets. Another gem along my way.
Month: March 2023
Another message on the bench
Around the new year, I usually get a message about what the coming year is about for me. Mostly it happens in a meaningful dream on Jan 1st. But it can also happen via signs.
On January 3rd, 2023, I felt like I needed to meditate and process some shadow work stuff and I went to the bench in the woods where I had once found a lovely message written on it.
To my surprise, the old message had vanished, probably from the influences of rain and sunlight. But there were new messages written on it.
There was also another similar message on the same bench which said
What a great message from the universe for me for the new year 2023!
Art in nature (part 12)
I love the filigree art of silhouettes of trees with an evening sky.
Singing after shadow work: the snowman
I found this tiny snowman during my walk on Dec 24, 2022. Here in Germany, we celebrate Christmas on Dec 24. So, it was a special day.
During that time, I also stumbled upon song We’re Walking in the Air (version with Peter Auty) from the short children’s film The Snowman. Such a gem! I read that it was well-known in the UK, but here in Germany I had never heard of it before. This series of events seemed like more than a mere coincidence to me.
The song was so beautiful that I felt the urge to learn how to sing it. And then I couldn’t stop singing it for a couple of days and I sang it everywhere, in the shower, in the kitchen, and in the forest during my walks (when I was alone).
What preceded this series of events was a period of shadow work in late 2022 triggered by a suggestion to do this work by Lisa Wechtenhiser in her channeling class.
I had looked at my anger that boiled close under the surface. Where did it come from? In my mind, I went back to all the incidents where I was mistreated from when I was a small child up to young adulthood.
While nothing super dramatic showed up, the incidents were still disturbing for me. Like when I was threatened to be robbed around age of 4. Or when I was wronged but was forbidden to speak up about it and defend myself. Or the three times I was sexually harassed from my teenage years to young adulthood. I felt victimized.
From these incidents, a lot of anger had built up and also some other emotions. And I needed to process that. Feel it and release it. So, I spent some time feeling all the confusion, rage, and grief.
The class teacher Lisa W. channeled the suggestion to come in as the protective parent in my meditation and sort of reparent myself in those situations where I was a young child. So, I did that, too. I felt a bit silly doing it. My rational mind questioned whether this would really help. But I did it anyway because it was a homework assignment of Lisa’s channeling class.
I have no idea whether I did this shadow work correctly. When is feeling an emotion enough to process it? And when do I start drowning in it and it becomes too much? Is feeling it for an appropriate amount of time enough to release it? Or will it come back? I guess that it probably comes back in waves which hopefully get smaller and smaller each time.
Afterwards, I settled into a calmer state of mind. And that was when the urge to sing started.
I had another period during the spiritual journey when I felt the urge to sing. It was around 2008-2010. Back then, I even joined a choir. I felt that it had something to do with my preceding onset of the rheumatoid arthritis, the discovery of spirituality, and my newly shifted worldview.
I had even read somewhere that in the shamanic traditions, some people go through the initiation of shamanic illness, then get well, and then they start to sing. There seems to be a connection between coming out of a difficult time and the joy that bubbles up afterwards and can be expressed in singing.
Among other things, singing probably helped me to let go of the anger about too little recognition and unfair treatment at work which came up in 2009.
This snowman song reminded me that it was now time to stop drowning in emotions of anger and grief, but instead to start metaphorically rising up and flying and to enjoy the lightness of being.
As a summary, I wanted to make the points that shadow work is important. The relief afterwards is palpable. And the force behind the veil sends synchronicities to guide us through the stormy waters of this journey.
Art in nature (part 11): snow and sunshine
Enjoy some more magic from my walks around the fields: glittery snow and sunshine.