Even though my spiritual journey started with the quest for inner peace, there were times when I didn’t feel peaceful at all.
In 2009, I experienced a major disappointment. I felt treated unfairly. Since then, anger was my constant companion for about three years.
About five times a day, I had a thought spiral running in my head, ‘This is unfair. I feel so helpless. I feel so much rage.’
I was not able to get out of the vicious cycle by myself. But the universe helped me in amazing ways to vote for inner peace. Each time I was playing the ‘How unfair’ tape in my head again, weird things would happen around me.
When I was upset, light bulbs in my room would suddenly burn out.
Or one day, when I was in major inner turmoil, my freezer would stop working, with a weird unknown error code. It would do that several times, and it always coincided with me feeling angry. It occurred so often that when I got really upset I would always go into the basement and check whether our freezer was still working.
On another day, I felt overwhelmed by the requests from society ( pre-school teachers, neighbors, parents…) and I thought , ‘Oh, leave me all alone! Don’t bug me with your requests of what I should do for you. Just stay away from me! ‘
And what happened? The cutout switch of the doorbell broke down and needed to be replaced ! Ha ha, that was a great answer from the universe. I wanted to be left alone, and if the doorbell cannot ring anymore, then nobody can come in – and I will get my wish fulfilled. Thanks a lot , dear universe. Very funny!
Another story: I got really upset about someone. In this emotional state of intense anger, I entered an elevator. Guess what, the elevator didn’t work. It didn’t even manage to shut the doors. So, I took the stairs up and I wondered again, ‘Was that caused by me ? Really ? Weird…. ‘.
Eventually I got so fed up with the high maintenance cost of all the burned out light bulbs that I realized that I should better watch my thoughts and my inner peace.
Here, A Course In Miracles (ACIM) was helpful. This channelled work is about finding inner peace and finding the inner teacher. Within 5 months, I did about the first 100 ACIM workbook lessons and that helped me a lot. Additionally, I had two sessions with a coach. After that, I felt sufficiently peaceful (and just stopped doing the lessons. Note to all ACIM folks: I am sure you will forgive me for not finishing all 365 workbook lessons.)
I had never heard of phenomena like this before. Was I going crazy that I believed that my emotional turmoil was the cause of burned out light bulbs?
But then, I met several people who had the same thing occurring to them. I have heard of a local area network failing several times, a street-lamp going dark, light bulbs burning out every other week, and an electric outlet burning through. All these things occurred when the respective person was in an emotional crisis. I have been told by someone who had a Near Death Experience (NDE) that this phenomenon is also common among NDEers.
There is a blog post by Lindsay Curtis about the influence of human energy fields on electronics with many comments by readers who experienced something similar: http://www.thedailyawe.com/2011/05/can-human-energy-fields-affect-electronics/
So, it seems that I am not the only one who experiences these strange phenomena. I am not going crazy. Good news.
On the contrary, by being guided to choose inner peace more consistently I am regaining my sanity.